A feeling of doom doesn't need a reason to count

Woke up with a feeling of doom and the day hasn't even started. Bold of it.

I keep seeing versions of that post. Some people write it as a joke, like I just did. Some write it with a question underneath: does anyone else wake up like this? The replies stack up fast. Me too. Every day. Same.

What I notice is the order. Most of the time we feel bad because something happened. The email comes, and then the feeling follows it. Here it runs the other way. The feeling is there first, before the phone, before the coffee, before a single email. Nothing has happened yet. Then the mind starts looking for the reason. That makes sense to me, because a feeling with nothing attached to it is hard to carry around. It might be the inbox, or the money, or something someone said on Tuesday. Sometimes it finds one that fits. Sometimes it finds nothing, and then the second round starts: I have no reason to feel like this, so what is wrong with me.

I don't think that second round helps anyone. Now it's two things: the feeling, and judging yourself for having it without a good enough reason. It's one more problem stacked on the first, and it starts before the day does. The feeling alone is already a lot to start a day with.

My opinion is that a feeling doesn't have to explain itself. If doom is there when you wake up, it's there. It counts whether or not you can say what it's about. You can be curious about where it came from. I'm curious too. But you don't have to win that argument before you're allowed to say the feeling exists.

I can't tell you why it comes for any one person, and I'd be guessing if I tried. That takes a real conversation, and it's a different conversation for everyone who has it.

If you told me about it, here's what I'd want to know. Does it ease by lunch, or does it stay all day? Is it there on weekends? On vacation? On a morning when nothing is on the calendar? Did it start recently, or has it been around so long it feels normal? Those are better questions than "what is wrong with me."

If this is familiar, write me. We can set a free consultation so I can answer your questions.