Why do I keep picking a hard partner

People sometimes ask me why they keep picking a hard partner. A friend says it over a plate that's already finished. You say it yourself on the drive home, like the question might beat you to the phone.

I hear that question. I'm not going to solve it from here as if I know the last few names.

You already saw it. They take days to reply. Then they're all in, and the week tilts. You told someone this one felt different. Then the same week showed up anyway.

You have a type. The type is a project. That line gets a laugh at a table. You still have it in the car.

You know their name. You know the hour they usually go missing. You still pick up.

That doesn't mean you want the mess. You can tell it's hard. That's why the question keeps coming.

Kind would be easier. People say that like you skipped a class. You didn't skip it. You still go back to the person who is work.

I mean the hour after the argument, when the phone is already in your hand and you know what you're about to send. I'm not looking for a speech about what you deserve. I mean you send it.

The screenshot you almost pass to a friend, then don't, because you already know the reply. You delete it because you already know they'll ask why again. You still wait for the dots.

Or that dinner. Someone lays your last few people next to each other and they sound like one person with different hair. You laugh. You say you have a type. The plates move. You don't.

The first week can look easy. A kitchen, and a show that asks nothing of you. Then a late text lands like a job. You rearrange the day around it. You tell yourself you're being patient.

You introduce them and catch a friend's face before the friend can hide it. Nobody has to finish the sentence. It's already there.

You already knew the first night it would be work. You went anyway.

Sunday can be fine. Monday the wait starts before breakfast. You check once, then you put the phone in another room, then you bring it back. You already know how this hour goes.

I don't need a cleaner story for why you went back. I'm not handing you a new way to choose. The next person might be hard too.

It's this week and this name, the hour you already know, and you still go.

If this is familiar, write me. We can set a free consultation so I can answer your questions.